Tag: womens health

Do you believe you are not good enough in life?

Women often believe they are not good enough

This little nasty belief lies at the centre of everything – I’m not good enough. This belief creates nearly every single symptom of distress women experience.  It is as if we in the West, despite all our material luxuries , are experiencing a low self -esteem epidemic.   So many of our symptoms, unhelpful behaviours and self sabotages stem from this one simple belief.

There are so many influences and assaults on our self -concept – the parenting we experienced, the educators we are exposed to, the media, our gender role, our culture…these all send powerful and often subliminal messages to our emerging self -concept from a very early age and continue quite relentlessly well into our lives without us quite realizing the full impact on us until we wake up one day feeling like there is something missing. Or everything just turns to shit and we don’t know why, or we just keep stuffing everything up.

So how might this low self -esteem show up in day to day life? I’ll give you an example:

Misty wakes up to the sound of her alarm blaring. Her first thought is – oh I don’t want to face another day of work bleugh…She reluctantly gets up and starts what she feels is the daily ‘grind’. At work she whinges with other colleagues about how it sucks that it is Monday.  All day at work she’s clock watching for 5pm when she can get out. But once she’s out there’s not much joy either, nothing to look forward to really, just a brief interlude before she’s back at work the next day.

How many people do you know operate like this?  To me it is tragic. What about if when Misty opened her eyes, she felt excited and inspired by another new day and couldn’t wait to get started on her new projects?  Because she’d cared about herself enough to follow her passions and give them an outlet. Rather than staying in a job she hates and feeling like every day is a chore.

This is just one of many examples of how this core belief can filter down and impact our life on a practical level making it feel dull and lifeless.

The good news is, if we can change this belief within ourselves we can create massive amounts of change in our lives. Could you take one micro-action – say to stand in front of the mirror every day and say to your reflection: I am enough. And just see how your life changes…

Love Honor xx

The top 6 obstacles that keep women stuck in a rut

Did you know that there are a few really common mistakes women make in terms of thinking and behaviours that really keep them stuck and get in the way of their happiness in life? As a psychologist that works predominantly with women I see the same issues arising again and again. So here I am going to tell you the top 6 mistakes women make with regards to their psychology.

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citypsychologist, honor

My aim this year is not to lose weight so much as lose my issues with weight…..

My aim this year is not to lose weight so much as lose my issues with weight because being on the yo- yo diet mill for most of my life frankly I’m sick of it. I’ve thought about it a lot, and yes I have done hypnotherapy, more than once and I don’t know why, but it didn’t work on me, anyway, I think the solution is really the same as it is for most things – Have your ever noticed that the more you chase something the more it runs away? And it is only when you loosen your grip on it and care that little bit less that it starts coming your way? Ever tried to get rid of a some-one you weren’t interested in? Alternatively, were you ever so desperate to be with someone you became completely clingy and turned them off?

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Honor holding book

Why are so many women perfectionists these days?

I had been craving for quite a few years to leave my privileged, fast-paced, inner city lifestyle and make a tree change to the Dandenong ranges. I liked the relaxed hippy vibe and thought it would be a good place to raise kids.  What happened when I actually made the move was that I met a group of women that changed my life forever.  Not in the, “I’ll give you a makeover so good you won’t recognise yourself” kind of way but in a much deeper spiritual way.  Sure I’d dabbled in Buddhism for a few years but these women didn’t teach me about this, they taught me what it really meant to be “feminine”.  And no, it has nothing to do with pink, frills, giggling and hair flicking or letting a man pay and all to do with understanding the beautiful strengths and qualities of the feminine nature.

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Are you following your own path, or doing what you ‘should’ do?

I have written about this before but I feel it is such an important topic I want to write about it again. The gap between …

‘Life is (often) what happens when you are making other plans’ What life is vs what we expect

Has your life turned out exactly as you expected or close to? If yes, are you happy with that? Or has life thrown you curve …

Its okay to not always know where you are going…

Recently my brother gave me a birthday voucher to go and lie in one of those flotation tanks for an hour then have a shiatsu …