I have written about this before but I feel it is such an important topic I want to write about it again. The gap between doing what society expects us to do versus what is right for us to do with our lives. Think about where you sit for a minute…toeing the socially acceptable line can be unconscious for many years until something is not working any more – it could be experienced as a dull ache of unfufillment or boredom or a more severe depression. It can take a while to unravel where we have stepped off our own path and onto a proscribed one. I believe one of the problems is being taught to listen more to our head than our hearts and emotions when making choices. Also it takes courage to stand up and say -this is what I want when all around you think its nuts. However this is the nature of dreams –they are really personal and unique and a lot of the times other people just won’t ‘get’ it. The wise and caring ones will listen and try to understand and the others will shake their heads and judge. This is another reason we hold ourselves back – the pain of being judged. Yes it hurts. It can hurt a lot. But should we let this hold us back from pursuing our deepest dreams and desires? WE need to believe we are important enough to prioritize our own happiness regardless of what others think. Yes it can be lonely at times but I believe its ok to be lonely at times. It is just another part of being in the rich tapestry of life. I always believe its good to start small also – whats one thing you’ve always wanted to do but have been too afraid? Can you take one tiny step towards this? It will feel terrifying and exhilarating and you’ll feel truly alive.
Month: November 2017
Has your life turned out exactly as you expected or close to? If yes, are you happy with that?
Or has life thrown you curve balls you never saw coming? Some of which were good some not so good?
Have you been given advice and gone against your better judgement only to regret it later?
Ever fall in love? Were you planning it? Or did it hit you out of nowhere when you least expected it?
Buddhism teaches us that expectations can be dangerous because they set us up for disappointment. The Dharma teachings include the practicing the art of keeping an open mind, expecting nothing and embracing what-ever life offers as a lesson. I love this.
As we move deeper into adulthood we can get very set in our idea of the way life ‘should’ be. This is a result of years and years of cultural conditioning from various spheres of influence and can be very deep. However, it can be damaging to never attempt to question these ideas and ‘shoulds’ as holding onto rigid beliefs can really limit our growth, cause us to lose our spontaneity, openness to experience and zest for life. It can also cause us to project these limitations onto those around us.
For these reasons time in quiet solitude can be a magical thing. This helps us to hear our own truth in silence and gives us a break from listening to the influences of everyone around us. Because people are generally well meaning but love to have an opinion, sometimes strongly about how things should go and although this may be valid and logical it may very well not be right for you.
So I encourage you to make space to really listen to your own thoughts and emotions in quiet. Sometimes these can be quite scary and hard to sit with but if we remind ourselves they are just thoughts and emotions and we don’t have to act on them this can make them easier to embrace xx
I hope you can have the courage to listen and follow your own truth in life.
Love Honor xx